1) Follow these brilliant instructions to train your doggie wogs: http://FunnyOrDie.com/m/lmg
2) Have one old dog and one stronger, younger dog who wants to take the other’s face off every time she tries to eat. She’s taking up the pack’s resources. How dare she try to have a peaceful last couple of years of life?!
3) On any fine Sunday morning, put the smack down on your younger dog when he tries to attack the older one. (We didn’t know our own strength!!) That way, he’ll whimper and limp around so much that you’ll cancel all plans and take him to the doggie ER immediately.
4) Find and try to remove a tick from your younger dog’s handsome little head — but, accidentally take only the body of the tick off, leaving the head in and possibly exposing your little fuzz ball to lyme disease.
5) Give both dogs all of the cuddles and lovies and kisses and hugs. Only so they decide to stick around for more of the abuse.
JOKES. Mostly. Both of our dogs are so sweet and we love them very, very, very much. But today (well, the last several weeks) has been tough.
Apparently, dogs instinctually attack older dogs because their consumption is considered a waste of resources. And it turns out our younger dog’s leg is going to be fine. He seems to be feeling better and better, and he takes regular medication to protect against lyme disease.